A lonesome NewYears Eve..

Yup, he would leave me alone for New Years.... =S
...I said it's fine,that he can go out. But he spoiled the mood for spending time together, as he was contemplating on going out with friends and his brother to drink and celebrate New Years... Secretly, I was looking forward to this night. I was going to make a nice homecooked meal for us, candles,and champaign,movies... cuddling up on the couch and chatting. But he kept asking me if I care if he goes out... Well, I preferred him making that choice on his own, in my opinion, he should not have even asked such a thing.. The way I saw it, he was saying ''So, would you mind if I leave you all alone on NewYears?I want to go party with my brother and friends!?'' He had known well ahead of time what um, ''our'' New Year plans were... So I felt like my idea wasnt satisfying enough for him... so why bother, I dont want to be the nagging wife, saying what he can and cannot do. I hate when he puts it as if Im the one his friends or brother have to ask if he can have a smoke!!PFFFT!That makes me look like as if Im the bitch, I always respond, dont ask me, not my choice..
But anyways....I was smiling when he was putting on his jacket... I was hiding my smile though... Why would I smile?.. It was more of a disbelief sort of smile.. He even could sense I was bit upset he was leaving, he said hes sorry,that he loves me,that he'd call me wish me happy new years...but it was more like, BLAHBLAHBLAHBLAH from what I understood =P
And out the door he went... leaving me with a shiver up my spine, and my heart fallin into my stomach.
New Years was never really a huge party event to me though... to me,I grew up where New Years was spent with your family,and some friends maybe. I didnt want to go out for New Years to party,as I have my baby Layla,shes my first priority,and I was content to just spend time with her and Mike at home.It wouldnt have been fun for me dragging her out late at night,and just sitting around trying to stop her from crying,while watching everyone else drinking and having a grand time. And all the other New Years with Mike, I was the host, meaning I had to be responsible for the household,and clean up afterwards,and manage the party,make sure nothing goes wrong.
Maybe this means something, I dont know. I guess it is just another ordinary night really?.... I guess I cant be too surprised, as he didnt do anything for my 19th birthday.
Seriously,not ONE thing, not even breakfast in bed,or a massage or picnic, or horseback riding, .... nothing. He made it up to me for my 20th..only because he knew how upset I had been from my 19th..
Some days... really wish I could go home. Shouldnt have been so stubborn and stupid minded as a teen.. my dad was right, and I had been too thick headed to admit it. Even though he had some faults, I now believe I had most of the faults.

Christmas,come&gone

This was me this morning,reading my book,Marley&Me, with my best pals by my side! =) I love moments like this!

Christmas has already come and gone!!It was a good Christmas this year, even better as my grandparents are home for the winter, as they usually go to Florida every year.

The year 2010 was a good year for the most part!Layla is already 7 months old. The marriage life is very nice too.

I look forward to the new year!!!May new beginnings & adventures happen =)

A late night Blog!

December.Already?!!!?!!Gosh, time is just flying by. Layla is growing everyday, is already 6 months old!Im up late tonight,its 130am... I was finishing up an assignment, as Im much behind on my course, and really have to crack down on it.

So I did not get that job I had the interview for.But that's okay.I was happy enough that they took interest on interviewing me.So I must be somewhat interesting,no? ;)

Shall see what comes my way, I dont feel very pressured just yet on finding a job.As I do not have to work, but I prefer to give it a go over the winter. Mike is not wanting me to, as hes not so sure he can handle taking care of Layla alone all day =P

Things have been really great between Mike & I recently! =) I love him, I just think I get upset and too lonesome with him away so often, and how hes been getting hom at about 7pm due to awful Toronto traffic!But Im always happy he makes it home safely.I worry everyday actually, that he will get to work and come home, safe and sound.. Life is a fragile thing. And I have realized that more and more recently, as I know of too many young friends of mine or even just aquantances, that have passed away recently. Makes me really sad, and cry just hearing the stories!... I worry even more when I know of someone who had epilepsy,seizured during work,and just passed away from the seizure.He was only 23,and had a baby on the way. =( So I just get paranoid something will happen soon to Mike or me. I know you cant live everyday in fear of dying.As thats no way to live!But death crosses my mind the odd time when I look back onto people who have passed away... just makes me all nervous...

I just would be very mad if I passed away in a car accident or something like that. It is one of my biggest fears actually!More so, because I had a friend who died in a car accident plus I have been in two myself.

Mike is a darling, he brought me home my favourite chocolates today when he came home from work!I love it when he does things like that. =) He can be charming when he wants to. I just think he is a bit miserable most of his days since he really dont like his job.. I wish for him to be able to do something he would enjoy someday.. Its just hard right now to have that option when supporting a family. Im glad he does what he does, as I know I couldnt do the type of job and hours he has to do. We both really look forward to the winter, every year actually, because he gets to be home!It is the off season for his job. This makes me love winter the most out of all the seasons!I always miss him when hes away at work... and Im sure Layla does too.. Sometimes Ive given Mike a hard time with random things, and I feel bad about it now. But hey, when you went through a pregnancy and just had a baby,the hormones are all over the place,so moodyness and irritability sets in here and there!heehee!But Ive been trying my best to control my temper!Gosh am I ever short tempered,but Im also easy to bring out of it! =D

This weekend we will be going to Niagara Falls, and visiting the inlaws at the farm. Hopefully they will watch Layla for a while so Mike and I can have some alone time together at the Falls.We rarely get to go on dates, so I really look forward to it. I love Layla though, but I also love Mike and want to keep our marriage strong forever. Hes been that one person who was there for me through thick and thin. When I look at it, kinda wonder how he put up with me sometimes =P But, I guess he can be a bit of a pain the odd time too! ;) haha.

Aw,I just looked around me,and my dogs and cats are sleeping nearby on their beds. =) I love them so much!I think its soo cute how they follow me around,if I go to one spot to relax they follow.

I have not been out riding much these days, but I know I will more often come late winter time. At least I hope so!With Mike being home, kinda get to go out more. I want to do more stuff this winter with Mike and our friends. Such as skating,toboganning on the big heal near our place,skiing,trail rides,random walks to Timmies for hotchocolates,walks through Victoria or Waterloo park to see the Christmas Lights!I find I enjoy winter activities the most!I like being all bundled up,and love to lay in thick pile of white snow at night,looking up to a clear starlit sky!

Mike and I have been asked from quite a few friends and family now, if we will be having another baby!! =O HAH! Okay, well ... secretly... I do want another baby.. But I aint letting Mike know that yet.(he wont know,as he never reads my blogs... ) I want to get my school done first, and try to work for a while,and I REALLY want a honeymoon!

But I do not want to get pregnant middle of winter,as Id die being in a late pregnancy in the hot summer time!I think it will happen when it happens... no plans for it. =P Im kinda done with planning out life.It never will go as planned,and then become all disapointed when dont go my way!So Id rather just be surprised,take life as it comes.Long as I live happily.

Well its quite late now.. I want to go cuddle up to Mike in bed. And dream away. =)

Goodnight!

Job Interview Tomorrow!

So I was looking over job ads on Kijiji today... as I am looking for a job come winter time... so late next month. As Mike will be on the off season, and I do look forward on working again. I would like to get a job in something different yet fun!It can be tough finding a decent job that isnt in retail,constrution or a factory of some sort.That is where education plays a huge role.But I have a good variety and experiences for jobs. I do have confidence, not once I have been turned down from a job I applied for. heehee
So I responded to an ad, for a Receptionist in a Custom Car Showroom!It's called Rockstar Motors Inc.
Seems they took interest in me,as they responded to my email not long after I sent it, and have an interview tomorrow morning.Hope it goes well, and I said Im looking to work starting winter time..So later in December. As Layla is still too young yet to be without me.

Kittens...ugh!

So my cat accidently got outside this past summer,and I always kept her as an indoor cat... I was debating on getting her fixed, but then she ended up pregnant, as she got outside when she was in heat and didnt come back home within a week!soo,she had 4 kittens!My sis took one of them.But the two males drive me insane.When theyre together,they get too rambuncious and excited,and they have been ruining my furniture!Climbing up my curtains,leather couch and chairs...they really irritate me to no end to be honest...I dont like kittens,but Im fine with most cats.As kittens are too playful to my liking I guess.I hope to find a home for the two males, but havent been having much luck on it..No way am I keeping them though.I find one or two cats is more than enough.Im more of a dog person than a cat person too...I dont think it would be so bad if they were seperated. I just dont like when my place is getting ruined from stupid claws of theirs.grrr!!
Mike and I went to St.Louis this evening to talk about things, and my sister babysat Layla for us. =) I guess I should get some sleep, as I went to bed pretty late last night too..

Cus I felt like blogging...

I couldnt sleep... especially when I have so much to think about, and I tend to look back on my memories all too often, where everything seems too fresh in my mind, regardless if it was something that happened 10 years ago! It's not that Im mad about it, I guess it is things that I wish I could have done differently, or maybe some things that I do not understand really today why they happened...

Another thing on my mind...
Sometimes it'd be nice if Mike and I could go out on a date.Just the two of us... to talk, and just I dont know,catch up on eachothers lives really.. as everyday goes by so fast, and we are both usually really busy, and Layla gets most of my attention all the time, so hard for me to pay much attention to Mike...
Regardless, the things that I get a bit down and upset about, most of them are just out of my control. I try and stay positive as best I can. We try and make every bill payment, and Mike supports me and Layla as much as he can, and tries to keep us happy and get us things that we need. Yes, it would probably be somewhat easier if I worked too, but I really do not trust someone else watching Layla... and either way, probably most of my pay would just go towards daycare.
I just wish Mike would think a bit more on wanting to put together something for just the two of us, where Layla could be babysat for a couple hours. Not that I dont want Layla around, but I just feel that we still need to keep our relationship strong and not lose that. Have to still put efford on a relationship, regardless if married or not. I think most marriages endup as a disaster, because some just get lazy, and there is no more spark, no more trying to impress the other. I just dont want that to be us! Our marriage so far has been wonderful, I admit, there have been down times, but that I believe is normal and healthy.But I also hope that there will be more to our lives than where we are at today.. I do not want to just be sitting in our apartment all day long, just me and Layla all the time. I need excitment, which may explain my frequent nights out on the weekends with sister and girl friends. But that's the thing, I also would love it to go out with Mike too. We are young still though, and I hope our education and careers will only improve, so we can make something of ourselves some day.

So I went to this cancer charity party thing last night... and made me think how I would want my friends/family to throw a huge awesome party when I'm gone! I'd hope theyd share plenty of my pictures of my most memorable moments in my life with the ones I love and care about.

Damn it, so my cat had 4 kittens, my sis took one of them home recently.. but there are still 3 left.. not having much luck on finding them homes.. and theyre driving me insane.. because they all love to play with eachother and they climb on everything.. and just make noise at night. Ive never been too much of a cat person... I much prefer dogs!!

Alrighty... well, I guess I shall get to bed...

Another weekend.

This weekends goin by pretty quick,and Im so behind on my course! =/ Just been pretty busy with other life things!
Today went to the barn,met up with a couple who are interested on riding my horses, and it went really well! I think it'll go really well with them, and they were really great with the horses. As it is important with me that my horses like the people also. =) Im pretty excited about it!
The other boarders at the barn were having fun with Layla as I was teaching my new part boarders =) Layla loves other people, probably because she gets bored seeing my face EVERYDAY!haha! =P
Our car is finally all fixed up too!The company who fixed it did a great job!Plus,they cleaned the inside of the car,and the outside!WHOOHOO!Probably the cleanest I have ever seen the car!haha!I love it!Mike has been letting me practice here and there driving it, but standard aint that easy, but I hope I will get better at it.. I dont usually like things that dont come easily for me to do.. so if I stick with this, then I will be pretty proud if I am good at it eventually!

... I should try get another assignment done.. as now Im going to be 3 weeks behind =/ ughh.. just tough keeping up with it all, as Layla keeps me busy around the clock!

Night out is what it's all about!

A night out in the town is one of my favourite things to do!!I love going dancing at night clubs!Meeting new fun people! =) I always make a few more friends when I go out! Always have a great time! Last night was first time me and my older sister drank together!HAA,was really fun,and hilarious! I sobered up by the end of the night though! We went to this club,DALLAS.Me and my sis rode the mechanical bull!So fun!And I was the life of the dance floor! ;) as usual teehee!

Today,just another ordinary day...

It's a Thursday,which means tomorrow is Friday...in other words,I have 5 assignments due tomorrow night!!The week has gone by way too fast!!Started my day by going to BlockBuster and returned a movie,then rented another.I have rented over a handful of movies in less than a month now, because I have this deal there for $10 get to rent as much of the ''favourites'' movies as Id like for 30days.Im home all day,and there is never anything good to watch on TV,so movies are nice. The blockbuster is like just down the street from me too, so I walk there in the mornings with the dogs and Layla... When I got home,I made Layla her porage, and she enjoyed that! Then I let her sit in her high chair and she watched me do the dishes..and then made myself scrambled eggs,a toasted english muffin with butter&jam,and a clementine.Was delicious!
This evening Im going to the barn to muck stalls and see my horses. =) Will be one of the highlights of my day!
Sigh... I should really try and do more assignments...

Main Events in my Life..How I got to where I am now.

How I am where I am today... Well... here it goes...

Born August 1st,1990, in Kitchener/Waterloo,ON Hospital.No idea what time or how much I weighed.Full head of black hair!With an older sister by my side,and still is.Then my younger sister was born two years later on August 16th.
We had moved to a new house in Colonial Acres in Waterloo.I still remember the first night at that house...I got up late at night to go to the bathroom,and I turned right instead of left!And right was where the stairs were!So I fell all the way down the stairs!Then the hall light was turned on,and there my parents and sisters were looking over the railing at the top of the stairs,askin what happened,and I said I just had to go to the bathroom,and couldnt see!...Soo,after that incident,my dad put We all really liked the place.My dad had so many projects for the house, like finishing the basement and the backyard.He built a nice wooden fence and he finished the basement,even put in a workout gym and a sauna!And my grandparents helped with the gardening,they made the yard so beautiful with all the nice flowers and shrubs/trees.My dad let me and my sisters plant our own tree,that would grow really tall!And we got to make our own bird cages,and he put them up in the backyard!
My dad decided to build a big shed,so I could have just about any animal I wanted.He made really nice cages for rabbits and a dog pen too.
I can still remember the day I got Milo...he was a jack russell.We got him not too long after our dog,Bow,had passed away. First my dad got me a rottie,her name was Zena..but because she was nipping my sisters too much,and tearing down the trees and digging like crazy,my parents gave her away to a new family.I was pretty upset about it,and kept bugging my parents for another dog,but a small one that wouldnt cause trouble... Then...one day..my dad told me we are going out, so me and my sisters and mom got in the car,and drove out to the country side...we pulled up, and a farmer led us into the barn.There was a huge litter of jack russel puppies!My dad told us to pick one!I was SHOCKED!As I had been begging my parents for a small dog,to be my own dog for sooo long!!So we chose Milo,he was the chubbiest of them all!We put him in a box and took him home.But he didnt come with his name,so I did a vote at school.I had my classmates vote on which name was better,Eddie or Milo. Well,Milo it was!! Milo was my first small dog,he was MY dog!I taught him to jump through hoops,and we would go for runs at the park!I loved track and field,I loved to run,and so did Milo,we ran together all the time..He loved chasing squirrels up trees.The only dog food he liked was ,Kibbles & Bits!haha!He loved to jump and always full of energy!
But then,we got another small dog,Suki.That was another surprise,but he was for my mom,because she fell in love with him.He came from a pet shop,SUPERPET...I had two small doggies.I loved them both so much!But my dad only allowed Suki in the house because he didnt shed hair..while Milo had to stay outside.. =( Then, Milo was starting to attack Suki.. So my dad said Milo has to go... I was soooo sad and was crying on the way to the humane society.. The lady just took Milos' leash.. I didnt even get to have a final goodbye.. I then visited Milo as much as I could, I even took him for another run. He began losing weight, as he probably wasn't getting his kibbles & bits food!Still,today,I look for Milo,wonder if he's still alive or not..and if he is happy..
Suki was a really awesome dog too though... I LOVED him soo much.He meant everything to me...
Soo,fast forward..... I was 14 at the time. And my dad would take me and my sisters fishing in the conestoga river. I remember when horses and their riders would ride by us on the trail. I had always loved horses, so I would be amazed and had always wished I could ride.
I would dream all the time, and I wished for riding a horse,full gallop,on a beautiful sunny day in a field... Again, there I was begging my parents for a pony!haha!Okay,so typical little girl???
Well my parents were not having it, and would never get me a horse... So, I had remembered the farm where those trail horses were from, and because they had the phone number painted on one of the rooftops of a building by the road,I managed to memorize it as we passed by it to go fishing!!!I called them right away before I forgot the number!I kept getting an answering machine...
One very early morning, I got up before my parents and sisters were awake!I snuck outside, took my bike,and had biked all the way to the horse farm!When I got there,I put down my bike...and looked at the coral area,where there was horses hitched up.I slowly walked down towards the horses, and petted them.. That was when I met Beth and Angie.. They asked who I was,and I told them I am looking to volunteer.. So Angi,with her pink and bright blonde hair,walked me up to the office..took my phone number and said the owners will contact me..I said thank you.. and off I went back home.. So it had been a few days, and still no one called me!I decided to just go out there,and staple myself as a volunteer!When I got there, I told them Im a volunteer and asked what they'd like me to do. No one liked me at first. But then, they noticed how hard I worked, that I was not a typical useless volunteer. I did everything, so much so where the staff got to sip on a few beers and have a few smokes, while I did their work ;) I didn't mind at all though.I enjoyed every moment of it. I think it came natrually being and caring for the horses, as I gave the impression I knew what I was doing. I observed a lot! I got better and better. Soon enough, I was allowed to go on a trail ride, to help out! I rode Shadow,one of the half lingers. He gave me a bit of a hard time at one of the water crossings! But other than that we did good. So I biked out there everyday in the summer, and soon enough I was given a ''project pony''!His name was Melvin.I will never forget that pony.He was also the first pony I fell off of,and probably the one horse I had fallen off of the most!!He was a half linger also, with so much spunk and spirit!I then had my parents visit the farm to see what I had been doing, and then my grandparents came too!The day I biked out there for the first time,had changed my life forever...
A year goes by volunteering at the horse farm and I somehow convinced my parents to get me a horse! =O YUP!!Every little girls dream!heehee!I printed off a picture of some horses that were at the farm, as the owner said any horse is for sale,for a price though. Out of the pictures I showed to my dad,he picked out Cinnamon.I had only rode her once to lead a trail ride,she was tad intimidating,had very strong stubborn attitude. 9:07AM On a Sunday,Feburary 11th 2006, my parents and I drove out to the farm,with a handful of cash... I ran up to the farm owner,as she was scooping grain for the horses breakfast.. I told her we were there to buy Cinnamon.She stood still for a minute... as if she did not want me to get a horse. We walked up to the office,my dad handed out the cash,they were counting it out.. and Cinnamon was signed in my name.Then I went and grabbed my Cinnamon girl!Me and Cinnamon are still together today,it being 5 years this winter together!Hopefully our anniversary ride this year won't be ina winter storm!
FAST FORWARD.... old enough to have a job.First job was at Olde Tyme Kettle Kitchen(a candy shop),in the St.Jacobs outlet mall.My cousin was manager.I was there for a good year.Then I decided to get a new job,so I got only a temporary 3 week position at Kodiak,was for a tent sale.Then I quit my job at the candy shop.My dad was furious,as I had to pay for Cinnamons board,and he was worried that I wouldnt be able to pay it anymore.I reasured that everything would be fine,that I know Kodiak would keep me as a perminant staff member.Then within those 3 weeks,I got an interview at BlockBuster.I did awful at that interview,at least I felt that way.haha!Kodiak decided they wanted to keep me as perminant staff, but I had turned it down,as I had gotten the job at Blockbuster!I worked at blockbuster for like a year and a half?...
......Biology class,grade 12. Hated school, it was never my thing. I wasnt dumb, I had always been highly capable of the work, I just found it a waste of my time. I skipped classes a lot to do things that I found more productive with my time, such as help at the horse farm!Anyways,as I was saying..Bio. class, seated next to a guy named Chris P. Yup,started out a huge crush!!Flirting back and forth.I attended school a little more as we became better friends.. I wanted it to be more than friends. Then I found out from a friend he had a girlfriend... So I backed off a bit.. He invited me to come hang out with him and his friend,Mike. As he had been staying at Mikes house for a few weeks,since Mikes parents were away on vacation... I said sure!
March 11th,2007.The school bell rings,it is about 245PM..(yes,my memory is that insanely good!)Chris and I walk out front of the school.. Managed to cross the busy street with buss' and kids all over the place. A white VW. car parked across the school in a parking lot... loud and ''noisy'' music playing, and a guy with a tuke,beard,earings,and a smoke in one hand. I open the door and hop in the back seat,while Chris sat in the front.. I say hello. But kept quiet most of the time. Mike was swearing at Chris,joking around,and Chris joking back..I dont know why,I had an attraction to this edgy-tough looking guy!I starred so deep, that the loud music and them talking muted. I was staring into the rearview mirror,as I could see Mikes eyes. I felt as if he caught me starring,so I'd look away quickly out the window... I was thinking to myself, I want to know him!I want him!haha!I felt excited,but then thought he's probably too old and has a girlfriend already.. maybe more than one girl friend?!.. We get to his house. And we all started to play some video games on the Wii system. We had a lot of fun!I kept flirting with Mike! When Mike left the room for a moment,Chris was worried that Mike would fall in love with me!As he had a crush on me,but I told him that he's with someone already...
Because it was now March Break,us 3 hung out a lot!I then messaged Mike off of facebook,wanting to hang out more,and finally managed to get his MSN email.So we would chat a bit online.I guess I pushed things a lot more,as Mike was really really shy!He asked me if I wanted to go to the movies with him.I let him choose the movie,and he chose ZODIAC..my goodness,BORING movie!!!!Way too long!I wasnt sure if Id make it home for curfew!haha!Was March 13th in the evening,and we met up at GALAXY theatres in conestoga mall.Mike wearing green hoody,tuke hat,and kackies(duno how to spell it!)he had a smoke outside before the movie started.. he drove me home when the movie was over. Parked on the driveway, leaned in for a hug, then I kiss him on the cheak,and then I decided,hell why not,and went in for a real kiss.haha.From that day on, Mike and I were inseperable,and would see eachother everyday!
August 8th,2007 5:08PM...A warm and bright summer afternoon..Bike out to the barn to ride Cinnamon.PLan for the day was to meet up with other old riding buddies in St.Jacobs,so I had a long haul of land to cover...We make it to the town safely,and meet up with my other riding friends..we rode around for a bit,but it was time to call it a day and head back to our own barn.They had to go the opposite way than I had to,so I took the main road back to the barn instead of the backroads..Bad idea?..Riding along calmly,on the main road in St.Jacobs..then hear a big BANG!And Cinnamon has us spinning in circles,and she is rearing up as she spins.She lost her balance and falls into the middle of the road,my leg stuck under her..I was shocked,and figured it was the transport truck that hit us..I got my leg out from under Cinnamon..and I panic,trying to get Cinnamon to stand.She stands,and takes a big sigh and grunt.I had her walk to the side of the road.Im crying so hard at this point,affraid that Cinnamon is in awful condition and would have to be put down..the man who hit us,took off..he stopped for a minute and hollared something and kept going!I was too concerned what happened to Cinny..I look her over..expecting blood and broken leg.She had a grill mark on her rear,and was limping on her hind leg..But I was relieved she didnt break anything,and was not bleeding..I called Mike,crying and told him what happened..He didnt believe me at first!Mostly because,first thought,how would me and Cinny still be alive,and secondly,I had a dream a week earlier that I got hit by a transport truck while riding.So he thought I was playing a prank..finally he believed me and left work.I walked Cinnamon back to the barn.We had a long walk..she wasn't limping so bad on our way,I was limping awfully though..I decided to hop on her back for the rest of the way back.She didnt mind and we took it really slow.We made it back to the barn..I contacted a vet about it. Then Mike picked me up from the barn and brought me home...Mike and I were in the basement at my house..I knew my dad was mad at me,I was really affraid.When he came out of his room,my mom and him were yelling at me,and I went upstairs,and told Mike to hide!!So he did and I went upstairs..My dad was furious what had happened,and that I didnt call the cops..Was a very awful day,it all happened so fast...Mike stayed hidden in my basement for almost an hour!Then I snuck downstairs and let him out. =P I am so lucky that Cinnamon is sound and well today after such an incident..
October 2nd 2007,I got kicked out.I wont go into such details,but basically because I snuck out.
It was a rough go after that happened,but Mike did what he could to help me and support me.I worked two jobs,Blockbuster and a horse stable.I still got to keep Cinnamon.I dropped out of school,but kept up with trying to get my credits by online courses.Anyways,I had a lot of depression through that year,but then I got a dog Nikki in the summer time.She had 3 previous owners before me.Me and her are inseperable!!She saved me... I also sold my horse trailer and bought Laudie that summer,and still have Laudie today!
July 31st 2008,Czech Republic,Olomouc.... up in the hills,beautiful scenery and forests around us..the sky was almost pink,it was a warm evening.. Mike pulled me aside..kneals on one knee..looks up at me,and opens a velvet box..and asked me to marry him!I stood there,shocked for a moment,and said yes!Right when we kissed it started pouring rain,and thunder and lightening!!The storm came out of no where!It was beautiful though!!
March 8th,2009..Louie,Mikes german shepherd dog passed away.. =( That was probably the only day I had seen Mike so upset and cried sooo much... He was in rough shape for a few weeks..I know how it feels though.I stayed by Louies' side when he passed...
April 15th,2009,we moved to Port Colborne,ON.We got a co-signed mortgage with Mikes parents for a horse stable!It was a good run,and experience,but money was just too tough,and with Mike having work in TO. it was just too much commutting...So after a year having the farm,we moved back to KW... But I got pregnant while we had the farm,some point early September.
Friday,May 7th,2010 3:00PM,Mike & I got married!At Kitchener City Hall. With the ones who have been there for me and care. We had a limo, and nice dinner at a upper class restaurant.
Sunday,May 23rd,2010,5:30AM,my water broke!I just woke up and it happened!So Mike was freaking out!Within half an hour we drove to the hospital...about 9 hours later..2:46PM Layla Viola Novotny was born!!!!She is the most beautiful baby girl ever!I love her!

September 1st 2010,Mike and I moved into our VERY OWN place!Into a high rise apartment.First time living in an apartment...pretty crazy,going from huge yard,and country space to the urban city area.But it aint so bad.

Gosh,so much more has happened,but I guess those are the major things so far...?...Time goes by soo fast.Within 4 years,I got married and had a baby!And Im only 20 years old.But I am happy for the most part! =D and dont have regrets.
I have to go take care of Layla and get dinner ready and have to get doing homework...








and then got hired at the stable I had originally volunteered at!As I was finally 18 years old.

Another blog,or as Mike says ''BLAH''.. =P

So last night,I was takin some pics of me and Layla,and my camera just SMOKED up!! =O The flash burnt out,and made a big pop sound!Not sure if the camera will still work or not,Im affraid to try it and ruin it more!ha!Hopefully can get it fixed soon,it's a really good camera too.

I cannot believe it's already November!Next month will be Christmas?!!!!! =O CRAZZYYNESS!The year is going by just way too fast!I may get a job while Mikes work is in the off season.I wouldnt mind having a job though!

Layla sure is growing up fast too.She has already been eating baby porage,and just starting on the jar foods.She can stand for a good amount of time on her own,just holding onto something else.And she really is trying to crawl!She giggles and is always happy!There has only been 3 times where she had cried insanely where I couldnt get her to calm down right away,and would try everything,but would comfort her much as I could.Other than that,she has even gone days without even crying at all! =) She usually sleeps in too!I sure love that,as I get good sleep!I started getting good sleep when she was about 2 months old!She even entertains herself easily too,just lays there and looks at stuff,and babbles to herself.

Just about everyone has said she is the most cutest baby they ever saw!!Now I dont know if that is just what people compliment to any baby,but a few people have told me not all babies are cute,there are some ugly ones!teehee!Sure glad Laylas' a cutie pie!!Im proud of her!

Well,I must go take care of my little 5 month old! ^_^

Sigh...

Today was a rough day... =( Just got thinking too much of the past, just events in my life which I still don't find are fair today.. But I somehow keep tuckerin along, and seeing my baby Laylas' smile or while she sleeps so peacefully, makes me realize that I have to stay strong and not let things get to me so much..
Im just feeling overwhelmed with all the stresses I have. As the saying goes ''Too much on your plate''...
Things between Mike and I are good though,our relationship has been stronger than ever.It is just other things that have been on my mind that are getting to me.
Well,I guess I should get to cleaning up... and whatnot..

How could someone harm an innocent baby???

Someone has to be just sick in the head to do any harm,or kill a innocent baby!Even though,it is quite common for a parent to shake an infant over frustration, as anger can take over. I would never do such things!When I feel frustrated if Layla's having a spazzing crying moment,I just set her in her crib,and give myself 10minutes to regain myself,and then try again to help her.But unfortunately,a newborn baby has died due to a mother losing her patience.

''A mother in Jacksonville,Florida, has pleaded guilty for shaking her baby to death after it wouldnt stop crying, and interrupted her farmville game.
Alexandra V. Tobias,22,was arrested in January for the death of her 3 month old baby, Dylan Lee Edmondson.Tobias pleaded guilty today to second degree murder, which is punishable by a sentence for life in prison. Her lawyers believe that she will get 25-50 years.Her sentence will be given in December.
She said she shook the baby because his crying was interrupting her farmville game and the baby may have hit his head on the computer while shaking him.''
www.indyposted.com


This is one of the saddest news I have heard recently. This earth holds too much evil-beings.

This Week & Things on my mind...

It's been bit of a rough week... Mike got into a car accident the other morning, on his way to work. Was not his fault though, was cars behind him that ran into him. Someone was speeding and just slammed into a car,and that car hit another in front of it,and that one happened to crash into Mike. The damage isn't as awful as I had expected it to be, but it was still a hard hit and hurt Mike a bit.But he is okay!That's what is important, that no one got seriously injured.
Also...earlier in the week,Suki had passed away.He was the family dog at my parents place.He was only about 7yrs old.. =( Born May 10th,2004 and Passed peacefully October 25th,2010.

I went to the movies the other night with my friends, Ang and Amanda!We seen Secretariat!Great horse movie!!Sure got me in the mood to race my horses against people at the barn!!ha ha! Maybe we will do that someday. That horse sure was a legend!

...hmm..something else that's on my mind,is how much it bothers me and how very rude it is for people who can speak a different language in front of you, and then no one will let you know what was said!This is something that Mike's parents do way too often, and I know they talk like that when it's something they don't want me to hear. It is just as bad if someone were to whisper something to another person, right in front of others. I just really really hate that. Makes me mad and puts me in a bitter mood. It is one thing to speak your langauge, but it's another when it's talking smack about someone right in front of them and in their own home, thinking they dont know. Well, Im not stupid!As I can sense body langauge and voice tone, sometimes that says more than words. But yeah,I just find it very ignorant. So why would I be nice and all happy to someone who does that?... =/ ugh... I guess they have a problem if I tell Mike not to do something, or to do something. Well, I find it dont concern them. I told Mike to not leave his change on the floors or random tables, because Layla could eventually get to it and put it in her mouth,choke or something!They may think Im too paranoid,but someone's got to look out for her,as small things like that count too.Protective mother I am.So what.

So I have been getting really amazing grades on my course so far!! =D woohoo!And I took this quiz on facebook,'How Canadian Are You?'' and YES!I AM 100% CANADIAN! =D

Oooo,and Layla got to meet her Great Great Grandma!! =) Thats one thing Im glad for having a baby young, because family of mine get to meet the little one I bring into the world. =) It's unfortunate my parents can't be happy and enjoy family.. I sure loved my families big get togethers!!Like the BBQs in the backyard at my grandparents house,which is now my aunt and uncles house!Or the huge thanksgiving or Christmas dinners!And we had so much fun with our cousins. My mom had always dressed my sisters and I so nicely!Just tooo cute!When I look back on things, yes, there were rough patches, BUT there were also some really great times with the family. I wish I could make things better, although I just doubt my dad will forgive... My dad and I are quite alike personality wise,I get reminded quite often by my sisters.. =P Piss me off,then goood luck.. same goes with my dad!It's been in the back of my mind to just go over to his house and just talk things out!I dont blame him in a sense.Sure,maybe things were taken bit too far at times,but whats done is done. Cant change it, can only move on from it. Me and Tanya miss our parents a lot. No matter what, no one can replace my mom and dad. They will always be my parents. Regardless.

Soo... my horses are doing great!Cinnamon and Laudie are the best ^_^ I LOVE having them back @ Zisters barn!!They seem happiest there also.If I were to ever have enough money to live on a farm again,I would only do hobby farm,just for a few horses of my own,and maybe allow some friends horses,pay real cheap board.So then have people I know and Like, to ride with and whatnot. And it'd have to be close to KW. As KW is where I belong,same goes for my horses. =)
The horses are being put into stalls again, so now we have to muck stalls daily. But me and Ang take turns,and my coboarders may help when they can too. I sure dont mind mucking a couple stalls!C'mon,it's apart of the horse stuff! =P

Alrighty then, I should get more of a start to my day!Need to shower yet, and go for a walk with Layla and the doggies, return and rent movie at blockbuster,and get some more baby porage for Layla,and maybe stop into the dollar store!And have to do some school work!Then mucking stalls tonight... I dont want to pull an all nighter for school work this week.. I may just hand it in late this time... Sure teacher wont mind that much..

Staying Focussed...

A hard thing to do,is keeping myself focussed on school.. This has always been a weakness of mine. I get great grades, although I just don't like doing the work and procrastinate often, putting me under more stress and time pressure to get assignments completed. It's a bad habit!
It is more challenging when I have to take care of Layla and have chores and other things to get done.. Well I better continue at it... Time to stay focussed!Two more assignments to get done tonight,plus a test..oh dear..Well at least I got Layla to bed already,and gave her a feed and bath and read her a book. =)

Another fun weekend

This weekend was quite fun!Yesterday I went on a trail ride with my two friends,Angi and Amanda. It had been a long time since us 3 had rode together.Then, today I met up with another two girl friends of mine who I hadnt rode with in a while, Katie and Sarah. I rode on Cinnamon, double, with Katie, while Sarah rode Laudie. I also had Barley & Nikki at the barn, along with Mike & Layla of course =) Barley followed us for the ride. We only rode around the fields, but it was still fun!Barley startlled Cinny when he ran out of a bush, so it was a crazy moment, as I tried to stay on her,since I was sitting on her butt!haha!But no one fell off or got hurt.It was more of a laugh! Katie brought out her really nice camera!Took lovely photos of my little family.
I love how I have been going to see the horses a lot more recently =)
Well... I guess I should get to doing my homework now.. Im a bit behind on my assignments..

Love Autum!

It has been an amazing autum so far!The weather is just perfect,the changing colours on the trees is so beautiful!It's my favourite season of the year!Perfect for going to the barn and riding, as there's not so many bugs like in the summer time!I find I ride the least amount in the summer and the most in fall and winter time!I have been enjoying my horses again, and they are doing so well at the barn I have them at.It's my favourite barn to be at!I have gone on so many trail rides recently!It had been soo long since I had been able to enjoy riding,since I was pregnant.I don't want to get pregnant for a very long time,or at all actually... I want to enjoy the horses more,and I'm content with just my baby Layla.

Finally,I go out on trails and Cinny aint lame afterwards!!This other barn I had her at,there was just way too many rocks and stones that Cinny would get bruised feet and was pure lame. :( So she is doing amazing now.I think they are really happy to be back at this farm too.I also got to go on a ride,just me and Cinnamon!!It had been like,a REALLY long time since I had done that!!!I feel like it's ''old times'' again, how Im at the barn quite often,riding a lot!Enjoying the horses to the fullest!As much as I liked the farm in Niagara,I couldn't enjoy my horses as much,since everything became about money and horses were starting to become just money and business,not enjoyment and a passion... I can even see that Im happier now,the more I spend time with the horses, the higher my spirits.

I took my uncle and cousin out over the long weekend :) I led my cousin around on Laudie,while my uncle rode Cinny. They had a lot of fun! ^_^ I also got to ride lots too!This long weekend, was really fun. I enjoyed it anyways!! On Saturday I went out on a group trail ride, and then at night I had gone out to party at a couple night clubs. And then Sunday morning I took my uncle and cousin to ride, and then I rode again that day too.Then Monday Mike and I made turkey dinner and had family over, and enjoyed the feast!! Then ended up just me,Mike and his brother watching movies. I am so tired out though!haha!It was a lot of fun! =) I'm just so happy!!

Happy as can be

Things have been going very well lately =)

Mike has been a lot of help too!Ive been cooking great meals,and we both do our part on chores and caring for Layla!

Today me,Layla, and my sister went to our grandparents for lunch. Always love my grandma's cooking! It was so nice to see them! My grandpa goes for surgery this friday, I hope it goes smoothly and he recovers well. They may be staying in Canada this winter, which the family is all quite excited about, as they go to Florida like every winter! So it'd be nice to have them here over christmas time too! But I know my grandparents enjoy going travelling together, enjoying their lives to the fullest. I would do the same!We also got a few pictures taken,with them and Layla.That too made me very happy!As I would like Layla to have pictures to look back on,of family and when she was little!

I have been so busy recently, just having a social life I guess, meaning less time put in on house chores and school... ah well, so what, I let go a little bit, having some fun!But I needed to just relax and not worry about things all the time.

This weekend is thanksgiving!It should be fun! =)

I like how Mike has found a hobby or activity of his own. He plays hockey once a week,Sunday afternoons, and I go riding on Sunday mornings, and sometimes on Saturdays too.. But we try and have Saturdays to spend together mostly. And Sundays do our own thing.

Well,I really must get to chores now.. I have to prepare dinner,vaccum,do laundry,and take the dogs out..

Apartment Life!!

There is quite the drama on our floor in our apartment!At times it can be very irritating,if it's late at night,or too early in the morning!

There are 3 seperate couples who are having some serious relationship issues!They all so happen to be surrounding our unit...

They all tend to have arguments in the hallway, and a lot of times, they are right near our door, since we are closest to the elevators.

The people who are closest to us, are so weird!They roam the hall a lot, and yell at eachother. This morning, we heard them in the hall, and the guy said ''EXCUSE ME!!!YOU THINK YOU"RE LEAVING ME,WITHOUT A KISS GOODBYE!!?'' ... and then there was arguing, and then he said he hates her and she said she hates him more. After that, he said he is going to jerk off tonight! Like, what the hell!? Don't they realize, we can hear them!?haha!

Then, Friday night, another couple down the hall from us, had a huge lash out, loud fight! The girl was telling the guy to leave, and that she's done. And then he yelled fine,that he will leave then.. and she said shes sick of his insecurity, and he's not her fucking choice!.. then,he went to leave,and she then says... wait,don't go!i dont want you to go!!... Like,WOW!DRAMA!haha!

Then earlier in the week,late at night,another neighbour beside us, is on his balcony.. he was yelling,swearing over the phone!He was so loud, that I could hear what he was saying perfectly clear. Was saying things like ''that's my son too!You cant fucking take him!He's old enough to decide!...Vanessa, you're my wife!.. Would you let me fucking say something.. I don't have $2,000.. '' All this was just being repeated and ongoing for at least 3 hours.. I heard other people yelling out of their windows for him to shut up.. So I did the same. Then I had enough, I went to his door.. But he didnt answer.. So I just had to fall asleep to it. Was like 2am!

Another thing that is driving me crazy,is how most of the people on this floor are smokers!They even smoke in the hallway and leave butts on the floor!Like, how rude! And some are too lazy to put their garbage down the garbage shoot..and they bring grocery carts up, where there is carts filling the hallway.

One day I noticed someone had put up a sign on the garbage room door, saying to toss your garbage down the shoot, because the hall is smelling bad. I made a new post, but not hand written one, a typed out one. I do from time to time have the awful cigarette smoke seeping into our unit. It gives me such a headache! I am thinking I will take it to the supervisor here... as legally, they have to do something about it, as every tenant has the right to ''reasonable enjoyment''.

There is more funny stories of things that has happened here, and I am sure there will be more, as we have been here for only 3 weeks!

Well, I have a lot to get done today!

Because I like to Prank Others!

OKAY, I COULDN'T RESIST!

Anyone who knows me well, they know I enjoy to cause some mischief here and there! Sometimes regardless of the consequences!

The other night, I had decided to play a prank on Mike!.. C'mon, it was a Friday night, and I hadn't got out of my apartment for a week!A little stiry crazy!So I decided to entertain myself!

... Mike had fallen asleep to the TV... AGAIN!!!... I was on the phone with a good friend of mine, and then the topic had come up about pranks. Then we joked on pranks to do on Mike. I decided I wanted to do one! So we came up with drawing something on his face... I had no suitable marker... Then we decided I should use paint! So, I had grabbed some black paint, and painted a dick on his forehead!!... When he woke up bit later, he had no idea. Then, I thought it would be more entertaining if I sent him out in public. I asked him to go grab some timmies. So he did... and was none the wiser ;) I waited at home.. and I heard someone in our hallway,laughing hard saying someone drew a dick on a guys face!HAHAHA! ... I totally thought Mike would have noticed by the time he got into his car! Then, I get a phone call from Mike.. he was very mad!! He was humiliated in front of a lot of people he said, as he was even talking to people normally. HAHA. Yeah, I still think it's funny!!! He is over it now, and I know in time he will laugh at it too.

The paint wasn't perminant either, so it wipped off no problem!! It was a harmless joke!!

I may do some more pranks in time!!! ;) Stay tuned!! haha!

PS. If he tries to get me back, I will just get him back worse! I always get the last laugh!ALWAYS!haha! ;)

How Things are With Me Right Now

My life has become more busy recently, since I have begun school... I am doing online courses, as this is much more convenient for me, but doesn't mean it is an easier route! I am currently taking 'Health for Life',and so far it is going well. It is for one semester only. Then I am taking two courses next semester. They are Business Management Fundementals and Enviornmental Geography. I am trying my best, and have found I have always got better grades in an online course rather than the traditional way, in class..

Balancing all my responsibilities and priorities can become a tad overwhelming some days.With Layla,chores,pets,school,and social life.So far I am handling it quite well.Layla makes things 'easy' going most of the time.Although, the past week, I had an awful cold, so it was quite stressful... Luckily, Layla is still perfectly healthy, and didnt catch my cold!I tried my best to prevent her getting sick.

This evening,as I folded and organized Layla's laundry, I had to put all of her newborn clothes into a seperate drawer. As she no longer fits them! It just made me sad in a way, looking at how tiny she was, and just how fast she is growing and changing. When people ask me how old she is, I say 3 months!But next week she will be 4 months!At the same time, it is amazing seeing her grow and the new abilities and skills she gains each week. One of my favourite things to do with Layla is giving her a bath!I also love to sing to her, read her stories and take her out and about!

Today, Mike and I just had a very laid back day. Stayed in our PJ's all day!We just watched TV,played video games,and I started a wrestling,play fight match with him!I dont remember the last time we had done that.For some reason, I felt young again.. HA,yeah,I know,I am only 20 years old,and here I am saying stuff like that.. Well, with the way my life has been, I had to grow up fast, and have felt like an adult for quite a few years. Responsibilities do that to you I guess.

I hope tomorrow I will finally see Cinnamon and Laudie.It has been quite a while the last I had seen them, since I was too sick. .. :(

There is quite the drama on our floor in the apartment!But I will leave details of that for next blog post for later! ;)

Another update on whats up with me!

our little family!

Things are going really well at our new place!We really like it!

Mike has been playing the guitar more too.I set out his guitars as display,and he now plays finally!Been a long while since he had,and enjoyed doing so.

Layla is growing ever so fast.She is really enjoying me reading books to her, and she's starting to learn how to hold onto her toys and almost play with them.She can roll on her side and back again.She prefers sleeping on her side too.It is just the cutest thing seeing her sleep so peacefully in her crib.She now sleeps in her own room,and sleeps a full night!We almost miss how she would sleep beside us the occasional night, but we have to get her used to sleeping on her own,and she is already doing well on it.Dont seem to phase her actually!

Barley and Nikki and Kittie all seem to be fitting in right at home here too.They are all very content.At first had some issues with Barley wanting to mark his territory!But seems to be fine now!Was very gross,and I had to clean the carpet many times with variety of cleaners!The smell is out now finally!

I am now close enough to get groceries on my own time, while Mike is at work. So that is a plus.

Been feeling really good with life in general. I see my horses more often now, and they are doing much better. I love going out to see them, spend time grooming and chatting with friends there!

Riding just takes all stress out of me. Always puts me in a good mood, and makes my day.

Hopefully I will see the horses again tomorrow :)

Just a little note on what's up!

Yesterday was so hot outside!So me and my sisters went swimming!Sure was refreshing!The pool was warm too.I decided to let Layla try going in the pool!!It was so exciting having her do something for the very first time :) She did great.I didnt dunk her head under the water,as shes still a bit young for that.

Mikes been working hard at work lately, laying bricks and whatnot.Which sucks a lot,as it's one of the hottest weeks of the summer!And we have a busy night to pack the rest of our things,as we are moving tomorrow!!AHH!!..

Im very excited to move!Although,we will partially miss this house... lots of memories. And Mike grew up here!! But it's nice to start out fresh, have our very own place. Decorate it the way we'd like,paint the walls colours we like.Make it OUR home. :) I actually will enjoy not having stairs!Everything on the same floor!Yup,I am lazy,mostly in the summer time,as I cant handle hot weather very well!

I should probably get back to packing now... have to try and get as much as I can done during the day.

Just a day out and about...

I took the bus to the mall today,and printed out some pictures, as I was going to do some scrapbooking.Something I had never done before! As I was at the check out,I seen my mom walk by,really fast,and down an aisle,and then my sister said hi to me quickly and said that my mom dont want to keep stuff from dad,so shes not talking to me at all.Well,that hurt and I found to be quite rediculous!The least she could do is wave at her daughter... Never thought my own mother could just turn her back on me,and not even care she has a grand daughter.But whatever, that's her choice, I just won't be going up to say hello to her anymore if I ever see her out in public. A good mother,always loves and cares for her children,regardless of a minor mistake they've made!!I think it just bothers me more,because I had a good relationship with my mom... my sisters never had too strong of one with her,so it don't upset them as much as it does to me. So,after I left the mall,I cried a bit on my walk to my friend's house... she comforted me..and then,I looked at Layla,and she was smiling a lot,so that just cheered me up instantly.
Then we started to scrapbook!So I have just become a fan of scrapbooking!It's fun!So far I'm making one of Layla,and then of our wedding. I also put some pictures into frames!FINALLY!I had been wanting to do that for so long already.haha.
Not much else happened today other than that...

Love Life.

My heart melts on how I see Layla growing so fast.She will already be 3 months old next week.I soak up every moment I have with her being this small!I remember when she just came out of me and was in my arms.I remember every moment when she had come into this world.From the first ultra sound,the first heart beat and kick,and the labour.I won't ever forget the details of the day she was born.Was the day that had changed my life forever, but in a great way. Layla has been a blessing. Amazing on how I've known her for such a small amount of time,and just love her unconditionally!I almost cry when I see her sound asleep in her bed, as she smiles in her dreams,and looks so peaceful and warm. I think of how amazing it is,how Mike and I have created such a beautiful miracle.
It's funny,how the smallest and simplest things can amaze us,on things she does.But it is all new to her!She started to attempt lifting her head about 5 or 6 weeks old!And her eye sight had improved after 1 month. She now recognizes us,and our voices and will turn her head to watch where we are. She loves looking at things,exploring,and probably drives her crazy how she just dont know how to get anywhere on her own.The best part,is seeing her smile,and make coo sounds!Her favourite toy is her colourful purple elephant!And she cannot stand any little amount of a dirty diaper,which I think could be a good thing as she may be easier to potty train!I haven't had too many difficult times with her YET!She's had a few fussy days,where she was awfully crampy, but we found that a nice warm bath really soothes her when shes not feeling the greatest.
She also really likes Barley,when his hair tickles her against her cheek!
I try and take a lot of pictures and videos,as I know I love looking back on pictures and videos when from my younger days.She also really loves going for walks,well,being pushed in a stroller anyway!I noticed she likes to be outside,and car rides make her fall asleep almost instantly!
Mike ''jokes'' about having another baby to me.I just know we aren't ready anytime soon on another baby,and if something like that happened,it definitly wouldnt have been planned like Layla was!
Yes,we planned to have Layla.At that point of our lives,we felt we were ready,that we were set.We had a mortgage,a home,that we thought would last forever,I had my career going,and he was working full time.Things were going quite well at that point. But unfortunately,things changed,on a variety of circumstances we knew we had to give up the farm.I was upset at the time,as I felt maybe having a baby wasn't such a good idea anymore.That we were now starting all over again,and would be hard to support a baby when I couldn't work for a while.But,things have been going better than I thought,and I do not regret having Layla.Not one piece of me.I feel she's probably one of the best thing's that could have happened to Mike and I. Layla is what keeps me going in life, she makes me happy and just makes me stronger everyday. I fight through any bumps along the road of life!

All I have to say is that I love being a housewife, and a mother. I love my life,even through the toughest times,Im lucky to have the ones I do in my life.

... bored..

Not much going on right now.We didnt do a whole lot this weekend.. .so I guess this could be a bit of a dull blog,but maybe that's because I'm having a dull evening,had nothing else to do.
Spent a lot of my time at the mall, just browsing around.Then we went to the apartment we will be moving into next month.Just wanted to get measurements of the unit and other information.
We will need quite a handful of things when we move to our new place.Floor lamps,shower curtain,toilet scrub,blinds,dinning table,coffee table,vaccum and some decorative would be nice,such as plants. Apartment life will be different from what I'm used to.. As Ive always had a big backyard,lived in a house.But I really dont think this will bother me.Plus,this apartment has a big court yard. It's a decent area in Kitchener, and I dont think itd get much better.It has everything we are looking for!!

AWE. Cant believe how much my baby Layla is growing. She is just so adorable, and we notice changes and her development every week!She now smiles a lot,and coo's,and seems to be able to see further. She now likes the soother!At first she didnt like it,she would gag from it.

On another note, I hope mike and i will be able to go on a honey moon next winter!Once Layla is a year old. Im not sure where we can go, or where we would want to go. We both were thinking of taking a road trip to California!Hollywood would be awesome!Im more affraid of planes,and a road trip would be cool.My motion sickness has been getting better lately.
Id like to visit Hollywood,Las Vegas,and New York at some point of my life. Yup, all the big busy citys!!I dont trust tropical island places, due to food and liquids I just couldnt trust.

Well,I dont have much else to say!! .... =P

some jibber,jabber...

Im feeling much better today about things! Mike sorted out a lot of the issues we had this past week,with Rogers and the apartment! So we don't have to pay such a insane amount of money to Rogers,they did make a mistake on the cancellation fee.Also looking that we will get the apartment we just love!! Its hard to find a place! Way too many crap places for rent,some it's shocking they can even ask money for it!
I have gotten into a good routine recently,trying to prepare myself for apartment life!I walk the dogs every morning,noon and evening,and just quick one before bed time.And even clean up after them.I dont mind it at all. It's actually nice going for walks,with the dogs and Layla.Gets me out of the house!Clear my mind. :) Nikki and Barley love it too,and they are very well behaved,they dont walk me!Which is great,because I have to push Layla in the stroller.
I cant believe summer is half way gone!! :( The days go by so fast.. almost feels as if the older I get,the faster time goes...
I have been really busy since yesterday!Just been cleaning the house like crazy.And laundry is a nonstop chore! =P But I dont mind doing laundry,find it actually a bit fun,folding and listening to music,chatting on msn..blogging? :P
Im looking forward for tonight,going on a double date with our good friends Kirstie and Tyler!Meeting up for dinner at Moose Win..um,dont know how to spell it! =P haha. And my friend Sarah is going to babysit Layla!! :) SO nice of her.. it's nice to just get out with friends and Mike.I love Layla,but an hour break once in a while is good to have!I love to get prettied up and go out!
This will be great though,since we are all really close friends,so I find it really neat how K&T are dating,because now we can go on double dates and stuff! :)
Woah,I just realized,that I will be starting school in a few weeks!! I still have to get more details though, but I plan to start 3 online courses. As Id like to get my diploma,and I only need 3 elective credits.So it shouldnt be too hard. And I may as well do it now,since the online courses are free before Im 21yrs old. Im a little nervous,as I havent done any schooling in a couple years now!And hopefully will manage doing well,as I'd have to take care of Layla still.But online courses are awesome,as I can do it on my own time,just have deadlines for assignments.
Im not sure what else I want to do this summer.. I would love to go to African Lion Safari!!Havent been there in like,over 10years!Last I remember going,it was with my family,and a monkey crapped on the windshield of the car,and when we got home,my dad was trying to clean it up.But at that time,we had just an old green crap car. =P So wasnt that big of a deal!The monkey gave its opinion on our car. :P
Well,this was just a random blog,yapping away of stuff that's on my mind I guess!

ROGERS WIRELESS IS EVIL

These phone companies are all a scam!They are such money grabbers,and will try to suck every penny out of anyone who signs a contract with them. They do not give respect or any care in the world to their customers. They make so much money and know they are a big and popular business that they dont care if they lose a couple of customers. They have proven to me that they do not value their VIP members. We pay a lot of money to Rogers a month. We have internet, cable, cell phones with them. About half a year ago now, we had cancelled our internet rocket stick we had with them, as we found out they had changed our contract from a 2 year to a 3 year term! They would not do anything for us about this,even though we had the original signed contract that stated it was a 2 year. We had even faxed it to them! So,we just get this huge bill,of almost $700!And so confused what it was for.So,Mike called Rogers,and turned out,it was a cancellation fee from the rocket stick!This we find is so wrong,as they had broke the contract,and they just found out what happened and they made an error,but thats not our fault,and it is too late now to tell us it's an error.As they had broken the contract,they made an illegal change to it,which had given us the right to cancel,and should not have been expected to be charged for it!So all Mike got out of arguing with them,is that they lowered it by $200.

This just couldnt have happened at a worse time.. when we are looking to move by September 1st... We can't afford paying a charge that is completely insane.

I wish I could get this out in the public, and put a bad name on ROGERS. People these days cannot afford to pay such amounts! They clearly do not care how this effects families.

I really do not feel comfortable being a Rogers customer,and cannot wait for my contracts with them to be done. I would never go back to this company.

Not sure what we can do about this.. we would like to take it to court. If I had the money,I would totally take them to court,no matter how much it costs,just to prove them wrong and make them look like fools.

Have you had bad experience with Rogers,Bell or Telus? We seemed to have bad luck with ROGERS AND TELUS!

F*** YOU ROGERS.

We All Have A Story..So what's yours!?

Have you ever looked back on memories, good or bad ones, in your life? Just think of all those dramatic events, and how one thing led to another. How fast things may have come and gone, how fast the world just goes 'round and time never slows down. I am one of those people, who reflect often on their memories, their past. Though, I try not to dwell on issues from the past. As that wouldn't get me any further in the future. But sometimes I cant help but be angry on events that have happened in my life. You can't change the past, we all know that. But can only try to improve and make a difference for the future. I try to live just day by day, go with the flow as I tell my friends! I find that for someone my age, has done so much, been through too much, in such a small amount of time. Which makes me wonder, how much more will happen!?

Im now 20 years old, married, and have a 2 month old daughter. With no parents apart of my life, their choice, not mine. Family is important,and I am excited to have started my own. But I look at my friends.. they're single, living at parents still, doing school, career driven, and not many have to be so concerned about their finances and bills. Responsibilities make you feel old. I have had many big responsibilities at a young age, which never really gave me a typical teenage lifestyle. I can't complain though, as I may have the life now which my friends are looking forward to having someday too. I'm just a road ahead of them.

I dont know how I get through the tough times, but now my daughter makes me even stronger when times can be rough. I am a mother now, I can do it all, right!? ;)

If I began to tell you my life story, then I may as well make a novel. Which is something I may want to do someday, and maybe I will!

We all have a story, every life story is different, and interesting, every issue is big that you cannot compare to eachothers.

I live to be happy, and I am happy to live. No matter what tries to block my path, I will smash through it, and move on!

If we all wrote a story of our lives, maybe we'd all be celebrities!! =P

MY 20TH BIRTHDAY!!!!

My 20th Birthday was amazing!! Mike really pulled it off on making my birthday this year one of the best I had ever had! I never used to look forward to my birthday before, as I found it the one day out of the year that was full of bad luck! Normally,every year something would go wrong on my birthday, either a pet would die, I would get in trouble from my parents, or I'd endup sick or just something would go wrong everywhere I turned. Well, that changed this year!
We celebrated the whole weekend,as it was a long weekend,and it's cool as my birthday is always on a long weekend!

On Saturday,July 31st, was the day Mike had proposed to me in Czech 3 years ago already!It rained after he had proposed to me,yet it was a beautiful hot day... and I found it interesting how this year, the same day, it was hot and it also rained! Anyway, Mike took me for a picnic at the park. He originally wanted to ride the horses out to have a picnic,but Cinny's been having lameness issues recently,so we decided to skip the riding. My sister Tanya babysat Layla for a few hours,so we could go have some fun on our own. When we arrived at the park, and started walking to find a nice place to picnic,I noticed this awful smell,at first,I asked Mike if he smelt it and that maybe it was some really weird plant... then we both looked at eachother,realizing,no,that smelt like shit!!!... So I happened to glance down,looked behind me,and there were brown blotches on the ground!..YUP! I just had to step in dog shit!! EW! Was so nasty!! So we spent some time trying to get this crap off my shoe!! haha! And I was like,Ohh great,here we go!!Bad luck is already starting!! But we found a nice place for our picnic,and Mike had a nice lunch prepared.. I LOVED THIS!! Seriously, I have been wanting to have a picnic for so long,and finally we did. I really enjoyed it, was probably one of the highlights of my bday weekend. :) So,we finished our picnic,packed it up,and it started to rain! The rain didnt last long,so Mike still took me out to mini golf. Im not really much for golfing stuff, but I still had a great time.

Sunday,August 1st.
MY birthday. Officially 20. Feel any different? With no more teen? Those qustions were asked by many. My answer, no, it dont feel different, as I dont remember the last I had felt like a teenager, Ive felt older than 20 for a long time now. Looking at my life and all my experiences and responsibilities, it's understandable to why I feel that way!
So, first thing in the morning of my birthday, I get a kiss and hug from Mike. Then I take care of the pets. I then decided to give Layla a bath, as I knew we had a long day ahead of us,and wanted her to sleep well when Mike's mother babysat her for a few hours..
We headed for Toronto... I was crossing my fingers that nothing would bad happen,like a car accident or whatever. Turned out, the roads were quite dead and the drive went really well!I didnt get car sick either and didnt take any motion sickness pills! So we spent some time at Mikes parents condo in Toronto, and I told his mom what to do with Layla and I had prepared Layla before I left.. so a diaper change and a feed. Mike and I were off to Medival Times!! Was really fun there! We had our picture taken, and we look rediculous in it! Then we watched a live show while enjoying a nice big medival dinner!No cuttlery!Have to eat with your hands!The horses were beautiful, so well trained too.Then,'our knight', gave me a ribbon during the show, that says Queen of Love and Beauty! When the show ended, Mike got me a really nice necklace! I love it! Only necklace I have now!HAA!
We then headed back to the condo. Layla did really well without us during the time we were away, she was all happy. So that made me relieved that she wasnt all fussy.
It turned out to be a great day, although, one thing that sucked, I didn't get a birthday cake! :(

Monday,August 2nd.
We got up early, and met up with my friends and my sister, Tanya, at Tim Hortons. Off to the beach we went! Grand Ben. I definitly prefer Sauble Beach though. The drive went well,and Layla was good the whole way there. As Mike and I figured, it was over crowded... long weekend, duh... But we still had a good time, I enjoyed swimming. Then we got back to KW in the evening, and I quickly changed into my riding gear and headed off to the barn!!! Every year on the civic holiday,HBA barn staff/volunteers go for a big fun and fast trail ride!!I had been looking forward to it!But they headed out before me,as I couldnt make it there right on time.So I fed Layla right before I went to ride. I rode Laudie, and had to go find the group on the trails!I just booted it around out there!Then,these two horses,without riders!,came running up towards me!I woahed them and grabbed the reins on the one horse,and continued to ride trying to find the group,and hoped no one was hurt! Then we found eachother, and they were all happy and the riders were okay! Then we rode out to this big field,and were about to have a big race!!My heart starts to race,and I become excited and anxious!We counted to 3 and off we went!!I went sooo fast on Laudie,I then pushed her on at half way point.In no time we were ahead of everyone!WE WON! =D I rarely lose a race ;) I won both races this day!I even let them have a head start!!!haha!I never went full out on Laudie like that!So it was pretty damn awesome!Another one of my highlights of the weekend!
But later that night, I got really sick to my stomach, and heard that our other friend did too.. and we were the only ones who got water in our system, no one else did, so they didnt get sick. But we were both fine the next day.. and I was so glad Layla slept 7hours that night!! So it wasnt a great way to end my long weekend, but everything else went so great and was a lot of fun!!!


Tuesday,August 3rd
My sisters came over to see me, and gave me a birthday gift!! And I love it! They got me a really big horse canvas painting, and a picture frame!So I can decorate my new place!

Wedesday,August 4th
Found out my horse Cinnamon is very lame, she just has bad bruising on her soles from the stones. So giving her some time off and will need to get her shoed soon...
Then Katie came over and we went out to lunch with Tanya,where our friend Sarah works!So Sarah served us ;) Then later on me and Katie just hung out at my place, so that was nice, we hadnt hung out just the two of us in quite a while!

Well Layla needs me!!

Where there's an End there's Always a new Beginning

So things are changing,always changing,and some people can't accept change and others adapt quite well to it... I have gone through many life changes,especially in the past couple years.I found it hard to accept some changes,but soon came to terms with it...had closure,and moved on to other things,rather than just worry on something that has changed and will never be able to be the same again...
Sometimes,the most difficult changes to accept are between family members and friends...
I don't have my parents involved in my life,and a few others on my dad's side of the family...but this isn't by my choice,it's theirs...for reasons I don't understand,and probably never will.
At least I still have my sisters and grandparents,and uncles. I only want people in my life who care and accept my decisions and opinions even if they disagree...
Well, there is about to be another change in my life,not only mine but my husband's as well... his parents just cannot seem to respect our privacy and the fact that they cannot treat us like puppets....his mother is a control freak,and will bitch and whine until she gets her way on things...we love them,but just can't stand some of the things they say to us and the way they treat us.Mike has had enough of it really... so seems our relationship with them has gone downhill..
Yes,they've done a lot to help us out,we realize this and appreciated it... although,this gives them no right to treat us as if they own us..as if we owe our lives to them,and are in their dept. Tell me if Im wrong?.... I mean,we no longer can trust to accept any gifts or generous offers from them,as they then turn it against us somehow.
I think the lesson that Mike and I have learned,and Im sure friends of ours have learned through our experience also,to not ever get involved financially with the inlaws/parents..as it will turn into a disaster!!! So Mike and I are looking forward on moving to an appartment as soon as possible,and moving my horses back to KW,where I can see them as often as I'd like and not have to travel so far..It will be the first time where we are not financially connected to his parents. Renting their house was a mistake,and I knew it was a bad idea from the start...but we did it to be fair to them..they feel we ditched the farm onto them,althought that's not the case at all!!We sat down with them and had a discussion before we even moved off the farm...we told them that we cannot afford to live on the farm anymore,we were struggling so badly,we couldnt even afford to feed ourselves!It was awful,they have no idea how hard of a time we had there...but we tried and gave it our all,but that just wasn't good enough to make it by..so we had all agreed to sell the farm..well they've decided to keep the farm,so thats their choice.
Just hate how they use that farm like a gun to us...They get mad if we dont visit the farm every weekend..well,mike drives and works a lot during the weekdays and last thing he wants to do is do more driving around on the weekend,and we need some time to ourselves,and with our friends..and it is stressful traveling that far distance with Layla..but they do not care about that at all...
Well I must write more later,as Layla needs me and we are going to our friends for a lunch.

Motherhood

So far,I absolutely LOVE being a mom!I love my baby girl Layla!I can't believe it's already been just about a month since she was born...gosh,makes me sad,it's only a month,imagine how fast time will go by and before I know it,she will be a teen..It can be challenging at times being a mom,but I feel I handle it quite well!
Mike is now back to work,so he is gone at least 13 hours a day... =( so we dont have a whole lot of time together, but I have to say, that I dont mind him away as much as I did before we had Layla.. as now,Layla keeps me company and well,keeps me busy! =D Layla has changed my life...in wonderful ways...before I had her,I was affraid that maybe I wouldnt like the big changes there would be when having a baby, but I love the changes, and not too much has changed on our lifestyle.. Layla has made me a healthier and happier person.

Well,the little one needs me right now!I shall write later! :)

My baby girl,Layla has been born! =)

Im a mommy now!!!

We had a baby girl on Sunday,May 23rd,2010 at 2:46pm. It was and is quite the experience!

...I woke up at 5:30am, and realized my water broke! So I nudged Mike and said ''Mike,I think my water broke!'' ... Mike was in shock!He jumped out of bed, saying ''Really!? Are you sure!? We have to go to the hospital!'' ... I then felt affraid, and from Mike panicing, I started to change my mind about the whole thing, not that I had a choice!I didnt want to have it over the long weekend!I had many things I wanted to do =P .. I told Mike to stop it,to just calm down,help keep me calm!!

So within half an hour,we were off to the hospital. My contractions had already started. Time was going by really fast! Mike helped me through each contraction, reminding me how to breath, and I feel I did quite well! I made it to 9cm without any pain killers... I couldnt take it anymore, feeling nauseous and exhausted and the thought of the pain that was about to come when I had to push the baby out!So I decided last minute to have an epidural. It eased me, but since I took it late,it didnt fully take the pain away,but I was able to cope with it,and was happy to not feel sick anymore.

When it was getting closer to the time for me to push,and I was struggling through contractions,Mike was leaning at the side of the bed... his head down... me and the nurses thought he was feeling faint... turns out, he was crying.. such a sensitive sweet hear he can be. :)

Then he was starting to feel dizzy, so I let him take a nap while I was to try and rest for half an hour.. that rest sure helped me gain some energy for what was to come!

...2:00PM... time to push!!And push is what I did!!I did as best I could and Mike was so amazed,he watched the whole thing and was helping me through it all. The nurses and Dr. were very impressed on how well I was doing,especially for it being my first baby.

During my labour,I guessed it was going to be a girl,and Mike was second guessing it being a boy when he started to see the head. =P

Within 46minutes,Layla Viola Novotny was born!!! She was lifted onto my chest right away,I couldnt believe what I was seeing,and have to say,I was delighted to hear it's a girl!!

Layla weighed 6lbs 9oz. She had a full head of blonde hair!!

She does have more my looks,she has my nose,lips,chin,bone structure,legs and feet,and ears. She has Mikes hair colour and his eyes,and long fingers!

We love her so much!She is so beautiful!

The only thing that sucks,is how exhausting it is,dont get much rest at all... Would be nice to have a nights rest,just full night sleep.. but it's worth it. Im just nervous,when Mike goes back to work... more upsets me,because of the long hours he works, Ive always hated that,and it sucks even more now...It is a huge life change.. no longer just Mike and I, we cant just go out on a date or even a bike ride together.. but we will have to find other ways to have quality time together..

I have to try and nap,but it is hard for me to be able to sleep during the day time,and I never liked sleeping during the day.. but I have to try as best I can, otherwise I'll become even more tired.

Layla just loves to be cuddled, she likes baths, and she eats lots!

I reflect a lot on my life, and how much has happened in such a small amount of time!! At 16 years old,I met Mike on March 11th/07,and our first date was March 13th/07 at the movies to see Zodiac,we became inseperable, we considered us official on March 18th 2007,and then I moved in to his place Oct.2nd.08.,and then we went on a trip to Europe,he proposed to me there on July 31st 2008,then we got a horse farm April 15th 2009,I got pregnant,we then moved back to KW for various reasons,then we got married on Friday May 7th 2010, and then had baby Layla on Sunday May 23rd 2010... and here I am now, a wife and a mother. I at times feel a little overwhelmed,on just how fast everything has happened on how fast time really is... I still have many goals to acheive,but want to take my time...

I hope I make a really good mother. I will always be there for my little girl,no matter what!I want her to have the life, the family, that I had wished I had...

It will be amazing to see her grow, and I know I should enjoy these times now when she is just little,because it feels as if it wont be long she'll be off to school and hanging out with friends,starting a life of her own.. gosh,scary thought!

And my dear husband Mike, well, he is being a wonderful daddy. =) He has been very helpful and loving... he just adores me and Layla.

Well, that felt good to just write what was on my mind...